“You remember the time I tried to kill you?” My brother asks, “Which one?” “The one in the backyard with the wiffle bat.” He doesn’t remember that particular attempt. He says, “We both did a lot of things we regret.” “Yeah.” But what is regret? The recognition that something could have been different—but wasn’t? HowContinue reading “The Wiffle Bat”
Category Archives: Memoir
So a Random Guy Pulls up and Asks If I Want a Ride
So I’m walking down my street with a full grocery bag when a guy pulls up to me in his car. He pulls up with his window down and looks me over and asks, “Want a ride?” I’ve never seen this guy anywhere in my life. So I wait for him to realize his mistake—because he must haveContinue reading “So a Random Guy Pulls up and Asks If I Want a Ride”
The Videogame That Changed My Life
I’m not a gamer. I didn’t even know what IRL meant until a few months ago. Shameful, for a girl from Seattle. But then, I came up against a challenge that nothing but a videogame was going to get me through. In July 2013, I was in excruciating pain. I couldn’t turn my head more thanContinue reading “The Videogame That Changed My Life”
When Diving Under the Table Isn’t Enough
Recently, I went to a Seattle bar hosting festivities in honor of the Scottish poet Robert Burns. As my friend and I ate our haggis and enjoyed the bagpipes, someone volunteered himself as company. A man in his sixties slid into our booth and beamed his red cheeks and full white beard straight at me. HeContinue reading “When Diving Under the Table Isn’t Enough”
Put the Sledgehammer Down and Step Away from Your Fear
So my regular swim instructor and I approach fear the same way. Soldier up. Power through it. Pick up the sledgehammer and smash through that wall, baby. But this latest lesson was different. A woman walked down the pool deck and introduced herself as the substitute for my class. She reminded me of Olympic swimmers I’d seen on television, petiteContinue reading “Put the Sledgehammer Down and Step Away from Your Fear”
An Ex-Mormon Meets the World
If you know any ex-Mormons, please be patient with us. A favorite Mormon creed is to be “in the world but not of it.” And to be “set apart” is to be formally blessed for a calling within the church. To be marked as different–as a Mormon–is synonymous with being chosen by god. At 20 I left all this behind.Continue reading “An Ex-Mormon Meets the World”
Truth Will Out: Stop Silencing and Start Talking
When I was 25 years old, I opened a conversation with my parents about the past. Or tried to. I asked my parents some difficult questions. I wanted to hear their own experience of our family history. I wanted to rip off the blood-crusted bandages, so we could all begin to heal. My family had operatedContinue reading “Truth Will Out: Stop Silencing and Start Talking”
How to Heal
“You’re really fighting the water there,” a woman said to me after I finished my practice swim today. Yup. A one-woman war against the volume of a swimming pool. Not going so well. “Try being one with the water–floating with it–instead of fighting it.” It would have sounded too New-Age-meets-Bruce-Lee if I hadn’t seen herContinue reading “How to Heal”
How Do You Find Your Courage?
I just started swimming lessons at the local public pool. The bleachers are dotted with parents thumbing through their phones, and the pool foams with children in orange and green swim caps. In perfect formation, they churn the lanes (“You got quite a boil going there,” one teacher calls to the most energetic swimmer. “You trying to cookContinue reading “How Do You Find Your Courage?”
10 Reasons to Celebrate the Single Life
It’s been fun blogging about dating this week, since I’m so new to the concept. But I wanted to close with a few thoughts on being single. Between the ages of 20 and 30, I was in a committed relationship with one man. In essence, I grew up in that relationship. But since the divorce,Continue reading “10 Reasons to Celebrate the Single Life”
The Trailer Park MFA 
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