1. Denial This won’t affect me. I’m fine. 2. Numbness I guess this is happening. Sure. But it doesn’t matter. Nothing matters anymore. Who cares? 3. Minimization Okay, so I’m losing job. I’ll be fine. I have a master’s degree, a teaching certificate, and years of experience. I’ll find a job in no time. It’sContinue reading “10 Stages of the Job Loss Roller Coaster, or First Thoughts on the Chinese Government Banning Me from K-12 Education Because I’m A Foreigner”
Tag Archives: depression
Why I Don’t Have a Therapist…For Now
Don’t get me wrong. Therapists are a vital resource, and everyone should have affordable, easy access. From talk therapy to CBT to prescriptions and support groups, we all deserve to live in a world where whatever works for us is available and affordable. I’ve turned to therapists in the past, and they’ve been a hugeContinue reading “Why I Don’t Have a Therapist…For Now”
What Are You So Afraid of?
If I’m being honest? Well, everything. Let’s start with coconuts. If you’ve never spared a thought for what can fall out of trees and kill you, maybe you should. In 1777, a woman in the Cook Islands was killed by a falling coconut. In 1952, a coconut murdered an infant. In 1966, a perfectly innocentContinue reading “What Are You So Afraid of?”
Nine Ways to Cope When You’re Stuck Inside
I’ve been at this for four years and counting. In early 2016, a medical provider ordered me to stop all work, and I was put on extended medical leave without pay. A few months later, my boss and I called it quits. After all, it was my second medical leave in six months. So IContinue reading “Nine Ways to Cope When You’re Stuck Inside”
Life Goes On: Trauma Revisited
TRIGGER WARNING So I don’t talk much about trauma on this blog anymore. And you know what? It’s a relief. I started to face the abuse and assaults I survived when I was 25. Last month I turned 39. I’ve been at this 14 years. And I don’t expect it’s a journey that’s ever reallyContinue reading “Life Goes On: Trauma Revisited”
Planning for Happiness: Four Tips for the Happiness-Resistant
Shit will happen. And it will happen on its own timetable. There is absolutely nothing any of us can do about that. We can prepare for the worst. We can try to accrue savings accounts (I’ve often failed at this). We can nurture the friendships that nurture us. We can be responsible with our healthContinue reading “Planning for Happiness: Four Tips for the Happiness-Resistant”
The Fetishization of Girlhood
I first realized that men look at girls as sexual objects on the day of my kindergarten graduation. Our teacher had set the theme as a Hawaiian luau (yes, cultural appropriation was all the rage in the 1980s). The girls had made skirts of green paper streamers to wear over our swimsuits as well asContinue reading “The Fetishization of Girlhood”
In the Aftermath
Jonathan’s assault was among the least violent of the assaults I’ve survived. In fact, to some people, it isn’t an assault at all. But its effects have been every bit as long-lasting and devastating as the rest of the abuse. *Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â *Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â * It wasn’t what he did. It was who he was. He wasContinue reading “In the Aftermath”
My Breakdown in a Bus Depot
And then I went to New York. If you have been asleep, New York will slap you out of it. I boarded the Q47 bus and watched the sunrise from the bus window, mentally reviewing Manhattan’s grid of streets and the carefully plotted route that would take me to the Hotel Chelsea for a nightContinue reading “My Breakdown in a Bus Depot”
The Decision
There are so many ways that society monitors and controls women’s bodies. PiMam’s family had determined how she could and could not use her body in relationships. Now, economic necessity was undoing my own bid for freedom. Every morning I woke to the sound of the kitchen hood rumbling to life. My mugs rattled onContinue reading “The Decision”
The Trailer Park MFA 
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