How to Talk to Doctors

Five years ago, I didn’t know the first thing about speaking to doctors. I walked into the clinic knowing that my health was eroding. I’d already had to quit one job, and I worried about my ability to maintain my current position. But I trusted that the medical community had the answer. My doctor wouldContinue reading “How to Talk to Doctors”

I Feel Ashamed of My Chronic Illness

It was the second-to-last assault. Jonathan was my best friend at the time, and when he stepped forward to hug me hours after the assault, with no acknowledgement of or apology for his earlier use of force, I felt the ground sink under my feet. Two giant hands seemed to press down on my skull.Continue reading “I Feel Ashamed of My Chronic Illness”

Gratitude

It’s been two weeks since the MRI. One and a half weeks since the results: Normal. Normal. Unremarkable. Normal. No edemas. No infarcts. No tumors. My brain is clear. No cancer. Nothing structural that would cause these symptoms. They are exclusively electrochemical, and they will not kill me. I had expected good results would leadContinue reading “Gratitude”

The Eighth Assault

You think you know someone. You let your guard down because you tell yourself they wouldn’t. They couldn’t possibly. They’re practically family. Maybe they’re shitty to other people sometimes, other women. But not to you. Never you. *             *             * I’d known Jonathan since he was in junior high. He had come home with myContinue reading “The Eighth Assault”

High Noon at the Vertigo Saloon

Step right up, folks! Step right up! Ladies and gentlemen, prepare to be dazzled! Prepare to be amazed! Those lucky few selected for this experiment will soon find the ground shifting beneath their feet. The very floor beneath you will bounce like a ship on choppy seas. Even when you sit perfectly still, the worldContinue reading “High Noon at the Vertigo Saloon”

What (Not) to Say to People with Chronic Conditions

“But isn’t there something you can take?” If you have a chronic condition like me, this question camps out on your front porch like a creeper and waits to hop into every visitor’s mouth. “But isn’t there something you can take?” It comes from the best of places, I promise. The people around you just don’tContinue reading “What (Not) to Say to People with Chronic Conditions”